1. Finding God; finding you

Not knowing who you are predisposes you to many risk factors. Not knowing who you are while in your midlife not only puts you at crisis, but also in double jeopardy! Has it been worth it so far? Is there more? Why am I doing this? Is this for me? Is this my purpose? Why am I pursuing this? Can I still do this? Have I lost myself? More questions than answers have been the order of the day but giving them much thought and consideration has led me to answer them carefully and non-impulsively. I made many great as well as not so great choices in my early life and am grateful and optimistic about this opportunity to impact my mid life from the lessons learned. Something about this new leaf really has me excited; a perspective which fills me with hope and highlights God’s goodness.

You see, I wasn’t always able to see God’s goodness until I made the decision to know Him. In order to know Him, I had to find out who I really was, a truth I was only able to unfold by believing that I was a child of God, created in His very image and that I am good! Surely, there were quite a few things I didn’t like about myself, but if this loving God still found me fit and lovable just as I was, then I had to give this love affair a shot! It’s no bed of roses (it takes a lot of patience to crucify this flesh), but one sure thing about the lover of my soul is that He is faithful! He is patient, He waits on me; ready to hear me pour my needs, wants and desires, even when am such an open book. He enjoys hearing me speak, understanding every word, every mourn, every groan and when His love becomes too overwhelming for me to speak, every gesture, every sign and every movement matters to Him. He sees each tear that falls, and carefully collects it in a bottle, then hides me under the shadow of His wing, where the devil cannot find me. He will never leave me nor forsake me, His mercies are new every morning, He has imprinted my face on the palm of His hand (swoon), what an adorable tattoo! He is kind, merciful and passionate.

When I apologize, He inarguably accepts and keeps no record of my wrongs. As a matter of fact, He dumps them into the sea of forgetfulness. With His life, He paid an eternal ransom for mine! I am no longer a slave to sin, fear, worry, shame, guilt, and so many other lies that the enemy of my soul feeds me on a daily basis! His love wins every time! Yes, His love, for me and for you. I have tasted and seen that this my Lord, as Priscilla Shirer would say, is “mmh, mmh, good”. Dare to taste Him!

Our nature as children of God is indispensable. We owe it to ourselves to believe that! He is our ultimate source! The great I AM, with whom nothing is impossible! Waiting upon Him is costly, especially when moments of hopelessness, despair, heartache, loss, turmoil, rejection, anger, self righteousness, worry, fear, defeat, et cetera creep in. But hang on, the anchor still holds! Several of my dreams have tarried, but I also have testimonies of timely miracles especially this year that have me totally sold out! Though He used fellow men like you and I to accomplish them, they were absolutely no human effort! God’s thumbprint was all over them!

These miracles have been legitimate grounds for me to remind Him of His faithfulness. What He has done before, I have no doubt that He will do again. I just need to believe and keep working towards every dream and desire and trust Him to accomplish them in His time, will and purpose! It’s been amazing to apply this same principle to every aspect of my life; seeking God in faith and waiting while listening for specific instructions. I am not quite there yet, but I purpose not to live another day saying, “If only I had done this sooner!”

No matter how nugging the questions or how overwhelming the motions. No matter how often you roll your eyes every time someone tells you that God will come through for you, just keep the faith. It’s okay to feel weary, then acknowledge it and in remembering His promise, work towards renewing your strength! He is faithful!

2. Loving yourself

You become a natural at self love when you know who you are, unmasking potential beyond your wildest imagination! Being given all things, means complete, lacking in nothing! It means making mistakes, but trusting yourself enough to eventually make the right choices! It means contentment. The presumably natural and greener grass on the other side will cost you an arm and a leg, try buying an organic beef burger! Not to say that you shouldn’t dream bigger, no, He says to find contentment with godliness as you wait is indeed great gain! No matter how slow the process, find it!

As a wife, loving my man stems from loving myself. Whilst his love and affirmation are healthy for our relationship, knowing that I am already accepted in the beloved confidently positions me for my role; embracing every compliment and calmly keeping an open mind and appreciating his point of view when constructive criticism hits hard. To understand that my expectations are his very expectations is a game changer. Loving him requires stepping into his shoes and offering every bit of what I expect from him; selflessness. It’s not a give and take kind of situation, but rather a give and give! God’s Grace is sufficient.

As a friend; I am either one or not, period!

Loving others means living up to your own expectations without expecting others to do the same! Accepting other people’s strengths and failures without passing judgement means loving with intent. God has freely given each one of us the opportunity to do so! Therefore, whether loving your spouse, children, parents, friends, coworkers, neighbors or strangers, you are the perspective! Love yourself enough to love others well.

3. Staying healthy

Knowing who you are means loving yourself enough to desire a healthy lifestyle. When it comes to taking care of the body as a temple, one can never be too careful! Taking risks in pursuit of success is a lifestyle. Rewarding or not, life should never at any one time be considered a gamble! Jesus paid too high a price to deny ourselves the full measure of abundant living!

When dressing up to go out with the hubs on day 4 of turning 40, a funny thought sparked as I struggled to slide my skinny jeans up my hips. Despite a few inevitable health issues over the past several years, I would like to think that I have been in pretty good shape, physically (knock on wood). I wouldn’t quite say that I owe it to healthy eating and exercise, in fact, based on the amount of food I consume on a daily basis, my husband often jokes about giving credit to ‘my fantastic metabolism’. Guess what? He might be right! Lately, the struggle has been real! I can no longer eat whatever I want, fail to exercise and get away with it! Metabolism indeed does slow down with age and though I feel good, I must admit that I have been packing on the pounds! The running track is calling!

Recently, my dad got admitted to the ICU. I thank God that he’s back home now and recuperating. To the best of my knowledge, in all my Forty years, (with the exception of our births), neither of my parents has taken ill to the point of hospitalization. Wow! So much to be grateful for! My parents are pretty independent, but as I watched my mom take care of my dad, I couldn’t help but be concerned about how to take good care of myself, so as to take better care of them. Mom is big on smoothies, and I mean, she goes all out; having about 15 ingredients, a combination of fruits and mostly vegetables, her favorite being ginger! Hubby and dad joke that all that combination may cause us more harm than good, but they keep drinking and mom keeps making it and well, they are all fine! I remember her bringing it over to the hospital and sharing it with dad’s nurses, as well as visiting friends and well wishers. They all drank it with so much joy that mom kept bringing more! A hospital room smoothie party that lasted a fortnight!

Conclusion; mom makes the best unsweetened smoothies in town! I am gradually acquiring the taste and hoping that our not so little anymore girl will tag along! I mean, where did the time go? My niece is all grown up and helping take care of my parents, yet I still constantly worry as to whether or not she’s making the right choices towards succeeding in life (like drinking mom’s smoothies), look how long it took me! But I guess that’s what parenting is all about; a lifetime commitment! I learned from the best! And to think of all the cradle years ahead! It doesn’t seem like I will be getting out of this Sandwich Generation any time soon! Here’s to a lifetime of smoothies! God indeed has a sense of humor! His grace truly is sufficient!

There you have it, boost your health by investing in things that make you happy; read, write, exercise, meditate, go for routine medical check-ups, know your body, pray, fast, volunteer, donate to charities, help the poor, travel, shop, throw parties, get a haircut, grow it back, spa, tell stories, love, forgive, have faith, live in peace with everyone and drink more smoothies!

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”
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Hebrews‬ ‭11:1‬ ‭NKJV

#faith&fear

IMAGE CREDIT: PEXELS

Mary, a high school freshman, has just received her first menstrual period while in class, soils her clothes and gets ridiculed by her peers! Their remarks overpower her, rendering every effort from her teacher and family to see this as a ‘special phase’ in her life futile! She quickly becomes envious of her cousin Sophia who had been lucky enough to get her period while at home, a few months prior, surrounded by her Mom and older twin sisters Carrie and Kerrie. She had been sheltered in loving care and kindness which helped her embrace this scary yet important milestone in her life!

Mary becomes withdrawn. She develops an inferiority complex and becomes a victim of bullying. Insecure and alone, she sets up a wall, which hastily comes down in Junior High, when a boy shows keen interest!  For the first time in a long time, she comes alive again. Soon after, she becomes pregnant and drops out of school to raise a child while still a child herself. She’s afraid and disappointed!

In one of her prenatal appointments, Mary meets a young woman who has been married for a couple of years and had recently miscarried her first set of twins! Two months later, she conceives again and is now worried sick from the bleeding she notices that morning while taking a shower. For a minute there, Mary wishes they could switch places, but quickly recognizes her thoughts as a sign of fear, and quickly reconsiders. It could be worse. Then she meets another friend, a peer, and just when she begins to get excited about having someone to share her journey with, her new friend drops the bombshell that she’s there to terminate her second pregnancy. Her friend’s wrong choices have led her here and no matter what she knows and believes to be true, she just cannot have this baby, not now, not when a life filled with dreams and endless possibilities lies ahead of her!

Mary remembers her fifty two year old aunt Judy’s bewilderment from a couple of years back, holding her first baby, a boy, whom she had had through a surrogate after twenty years of marriage. He is still Mary’s only male cousin. Then the drama that would later unfold after the surrogate mother suffered from a severe case of postpartum depression! Aunt Judy took her in and cared for her alongside her newborn baby! What a big heart she must have had! Mary thought. At thirty years old, aunt Judy was the last of her friends to get married. She kept their entire family’s ribs cracking from laughter every Christmas morning, running under the tree to check whether santa had finally found her a ‘nice man’ to marry. Alienated by her friends as a result of their dwindling commonality, her world begun to get very lonely, until uncle Job came along and swept her off her feet that same year, with his European accent! He had wrapped the engagement ring and left it under the tree just as she had wished over the years! It was indeed a dream come true and remains the best christmas yet!

Aunt Judy was also the reason why Mary had decided to keep her baby.  Having struggled with infertility for half her life without any prior history of reproductive issues, she had said to Mary,  “I know you had not prepared for this baby to come this early boo, but the fact remains that you are pregnant! From where I stand, that’s a good thing. Consider this a blessing and have this baby now when the odds are in your favor child. There’s no telling what the future holds. You are better off having this child than not. Live for today.”

Mary’s day dream is cut short when another woman comes running from across the hall, hands and clothes soaked in blood, screaming and shouting while attempting to pull her hair off. She has just lost her only child through a tragic road accident and no one seems able to calm her down. It’s too devastating for Mary to watch as the woman’s husband desperately pleads with the doctors to give her ‘something to help her calm down!’

Mary thinks of her Dad, as tears begin to stream down her face. He had suffered  multiple complications from a severe spinal cord injury during a skiing accident and succumbed after being in a coma for eleven months! She was only eight, but still remembers how her Mom spent all of her days caring for their Dad without neglecting her children. It was the saddest day of their lives when he died. She missed him dearly, and though his death kind of tore her family apart, she was glad that he suffered no more.

Overcome by grief, Mary’s mother and her brother in law Dave (her late husband’s brother), become trapped in a dangerous extramarital affair! It is the beginning of the end of everything they have both worked so hard to love and protect. Eventually, she suffers from severe depression and does a good job hiding it from everyone at first, but the pain, shame and guilt are too much for her to bear. After she cancels their biweekly breakfast date for the third time in a row, her best friend Joan, notices her out of character behavior and realizes that something must be terribly wrong. Heeding her intuition, Joan immediately takes off for her friend’s house, only to catch her in time to attempt throwing in the towel on life! Joan confiscates all the pills from her friend and gets her help. She’s not particularly thrilled about her friend’s choices, but her highly, socially and morally upright character, has to count for something. Soon, she discovers that her friend is really at a very dark place. Despising the backlash from angry and disappointed family and friends, Joan chooses to refrain from further insulting her friend’s already injured and compromised integrity. She stands by her and helps her through her healing journey.

It doesn’t come as a surprise to Joan when her noble act is not warmly received by everyone. She has been preparing for this moment since the day she decided to stand by her friend, allowing God to be her sole advocate.  Mary’s mom hates to see her friend in this position and wishes she could take all this away somehow, but she can’t. Forgetting the former things and moving on as forgiven and loved, has been a hard pill to swallow, but she has to accept this as the only reality as to how God sees her.  She’s made peace with God and hopes that her family and friends will find it in their hearts to forgive her.
She is, however, certain of one thing; that she has a true friend in Joan. If not for her own, then she will have to spend the rest of her life protecting Joan’s honor for the kindness bestowed upon her. The two friends stick together and find the courage to hold their heads up while living in spirit and in truth. They are both co-founders of MLP Corp Voluntary Counselling and Testing Centers for HIV/AIDS.

By the time of her father’s demise, Mary’s eldest sister Molly, was at a crucial stage of development. Transitioning through puberty, identity crisis and the loss of a father were an absolute nightmare! Molly desperately needed her mother but she was absent, completely blindsided by her own selfish desires! Unable to cope, Molly migrated to Europe, to live with her aunt.

Mary’s cousin Carrie, (Uncle Dave’s daughter), is an Ivy League College Freshman. Despite multiple attempts from Mary’s Mom and Joan at LMP Corp, Carrie continues to be a runaway child and remains adamant about not returning home. It’s not at all conducive for her asthma, but her twin sister’s recent demise is rather hard to comprehend. Consumed by her own mess and lost to depression, Kerrie jumps off the bridge! Carrie blames herself and her parents for not paying enough attention to her sister. Their Dad had always pushed them to study hard and take advanced classes in school. He had had a rough upbringing, and missed out on his opportunity to become what he would have wanted to in life. Every time he asked his daughters what they desired to become when they grew up, Kerrie would enthusiastically shout, “Fashion Designer!”, but her Dad would always replace that with “Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer, etc.”

Their Mom was always open to whatever interested their daughters so much that she at one time surprised Kerrie with a venture to Europe in fashion pursuit, but her Dad would still insist that fashion should remain secondary to ‘a more realistic career!’ Kerrie would spend most of her time sketching outfits and anything else that her brilliant mind would conjure. She was also eventually accepted into one of the most elite colleges of design in the country and seemed to have been doing pretty well. She was determined to prove her Dad wrong. But she’s gone too soon now and he can’t bring her back!  He must try a different approach with the remaining two; stop living vicariously through them.

Carrie is bitter and angry and no amount of love or affection from her parents is able to fill the void! How could they not know? How could she not? She hates them! She hates herself! She wants to die, but is holding on to an unknown source of strength. It’s packaged with fear, but the fact that she’s still surviving, calls for a glimmer of hope! For now, she just wants to be left alone.
Carrie enjoys the comfort that strolling up and down the streets bring. No one is in her business. No one has to tell her about the loving God whom in her perception, has just killed her twin sister, and given her mom cancer. “Mom is already too stressed out from the cancer diagnosis to handle a depressed and HIV positive daughter. At least she’ll be left with one smart and brilliant daughter who likes school and values life. My absence will make it easier for everyone because no one should ever have to bear the burden of my mistakes.” Read an excerpt from her twin Sister’s suicide note.  Shortly following her sister’s death, Carrie had wondered at what point the cookie had crumbled really, but here lay her answer! How unfair and wrong Kerrie had been! Carrie thought as she sat under the huge walnut tree in the middle of the shelter for the homeless. This is where she comes to relax with her books and music after her meals, then waits for darkness to creep in and sneak back into her parent’s house and out again at the earliest dawn! She thinks that she has everyone fooled, but never wonders why no one comes looking for her any more!

Deeply consumed in her thoughts that cool Sunday evening, knees to her chest and arms around her knees, a voice startles her, “Hey, what are you reading today?” Carrie turns to see a shabbily dressed young man, not much older than she was, peeking his head from the opposite side of the tree. She had seen him and his two friends, a girl and boy get food a couple of times at the shelter before, but had never talked to any of them.  “None of your business.” Carrie replies. “Trouble at home?” The young man asks. Pausing for a while, Carrie says, “ I’d rather not talk about it. What are you doing here anyway?” “I came home two weeks ago from school to find an eviction notice on our door. My Mom took my younger sister and told me to stay put, till she got back. She’s been gone a while now, and doesn’t know that the landlord put me out last week. He knows that I work part time and thinks that am just buying us more time by lying about Mom’s whereabouts.” Says the young man. “You are joking right?” Carrie asks. “Nope!” Replies the young man.  

Suddenly, Carrie gets on her feet and says, “I don’t live too far from here. Would you like to come spend the night at my house? I am sure my parents will not mind at all.” “Thank you but I don’t think your home is cozy enough if you’re out here in the dark and would much rather not talk about it. Besides, I would hate for my Mom or Jamie and Jeannie to come looking for me and not know where to find me. You go on. Thank you.” “Jamie and Jeannie?” Asks Carrie. “Yes, we hang out over here twice a week before going home.” Says the young man. “Home? I don’t understand? Didn’t you just say that”… and before Carrie finishes, the young man interjects, “Yeah, yeah. The Landlord put me out, but I have ways of sneaking back unnoticed. Carrie laughs, covers her mouth with the tips of her right fore and middle fingers, apologizes, then asks him to continue. “Jamie and Jeannie are siblings”, he goes on. “They are new to this country. Joe, the shelter’s security guard and I usually escort them back to their refugee camp on Wednesday night. It’s their only chance to enjoy strolling through the city, so we usually meet here at six o’clock in the evening. A couple of weeks ago, in the corner of 20th street and 6th avenue North, while walking home, I saw some unusual activity and dialed 911. The cops managed to rescue Jeannie from a gang of rapists, but her friend Miley, wasn’t so lucky. It’s a dark world out here. Hurry on home.”

Just then, Carrie realizes that her Sister’s death, dropping out of school and running away from home are as detrimental to her Mom’s health as her cancer diagnosis! If she goes back home, then her Mom will find the extra ounce of strength to fight the cancer. “Come with me, please. Your friends can come too.” She pleads with the young man once more. “No, thank you. Go on home girl.” He replies. “I will check on you tomorrow then.” Says Carrie. She hangs her backpack over her shoulders and begins to run. As the gap between them widens, she looks back at the young man and shouts, “I am Carrie, by the way and am such an idiot!” Smiling, he waves at her and shouts, “It’s nice to meet you Carrie. I am Gale.” She smiles and continues to run as he watches her disappear into the horizon. She rings the doorbell, her Dad opens the door, she rolls her eyes, then heads straight for the stairs! The truth is, she’s too embarrassed to face her parents right now, but knowing that she’s home safe and sound, takes one load off their shoulders!

As she unpacks her bag and enjoys settling in freedom, she looks through her window and notices an argument between two people in her next door neighbor’s kitchen. She’s absolutely sure that one of them is her aunt, Mary’s Mom, well because, that’s her house, but she can’t quite identify the other young looking fella. She hadn’t seen him before, but something about his body posture seems familiar. To satisfy her curiosity, she draws near for a closer look and again for a clearer one! ‘Holy Moly!” she whispers to herself. Suddenly, she clasps her mouth with both her palms, and runs downstairs shouting, “no,no, no, no, no.”

She storms out of the door, and hurries straight to her aunt’s house. She uses the sidewalk to the kitchen window, waves at both of them and signals them to open the door. As soon as her aunt lets her in, she says “Cousin Molly? Is that you?” “It’s me Carrie, but I go by Maurice now”, says Cousin Molly. Carrie gives Maurice a warm embrace and says, “Well then Maurice, ten years is a long time! It’s really good to see you! Welcome home.” “Guess that makes the two of us!” Says Maurice. The two let out a hearty laughter as Maurice extends an invitation to Carrie for a quick drive to the hospital to pick up Mary from her appointment. Carrie gives her aunt a hug and whispers in her ears, “Don’t be too hard on her!” And the two young adults head on their way.

Over time, the two families had been able to reconcile their differences and restore their broken relationship by God’s Grace. These cousins had been born and raised together and no matter how severe the friction rub between their families, love had conquered!

It has been a long wait for Mary at the ER. She needs a breath of fresh air, and just as she steps outside of the double front doors, she notices a young couple seeming to have an argument not too far from where she’s standing. When he sees her, the young man lowers his voice, but Mary still manages to hear him say, “I am so sorry honey, it won’t happen again. I promise, it was an accident. I didn’t mean to do it.” The young lady upon noticing Mary, pushes the young man aside, and makes her way through the double front doors. The young man stands there agitated, for a while, then leaves. Mary comes back in to notice the bruises on the young lady’s right eye and suddenly, her eyes and heart sink! The pressure of this long ER wait is beginning to surmount! Just as she contemplates leaving, the nurse calls her name. She’s ecstatic to finally leave the waiting room!

A week later, Mary gets a follow up phone call from the hospital. It’s not good. Her baby boy has a very rare congenital defect. It may be fatal to both her and the baby! She has a tough decision to make! She’s crushed! And so is her supportive family! Remembering aunt Judy’s words of wisdom, she makes up her mind to keep the baby. She chooses to trust in a loving God whom she’s come to know. Both their future is in His Hands!

In honor of the just concluded women’s month, I would like to honor Mary, the protagonist in this figment of my imagination! In one way or another, her dynamic character reveals the nature of the different hard faces we wear as women. Her story may have barely scratched the surface of your experiences, but irrespective of how closely or not it resonates, I want you to believe that you are not alone.

It’s April fools! In your vulnerability, be watchful that the enemy may not lure you into his lair with reckless innuendos. No matter how sweet the sound of his voice, he is a liar! Embrace your pain as you search out the heart of God in your matter and take heed to remain strong. You are preparing the fertile ground for your breakthrough. You may be tempted to be angry, malicious, inflict pain on those who have wronged you, be jealous, cuss, et cetera. Confront your emotions by letting God know exactly how you feel. That way, you can enjoy the pleasure of fooling the devil instead, into thinking that he’s got you really good! You can’t get rid of what you don’t possess. To my understanding, as creatures of habit, these are natural responses to our circumstances. They only become toxic when we allow them to consume us.
But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. Colossians 3:8

Your joy is imminent! Share your feelings with God and boldly wear your overcomer face! It will be morning soon! Hold on!

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:23 NKJV

#SayNoToFear

Apprehension, uncertainty, waiting, expectation, fear of surprise, do a patient more harm than any exertion.

Florence Nightingale.

One thing I love about Netflix, Hulu and On Demand, is the ability to binge watch my favorite shows, especially, TV series. As far as waiting is concerned, I am the typical patient from Nightingale’s imagination!  In an episode I recently watched on Greenleaf, Sophia, a teenage girl in Senior High, who has grown to love the Lord passionately, suffers from ovarian torsion, resulting in the loss of both her ovaries. Bad timing! She and her boyfriend were getting closer and based on his enthusiasm, she seemed so excited about the possibility of Motherhood that she shares her feelings with her Mother, right before the surgery.

Unable to comprehend why her loving God would allow her to go through such a painful and life changing ordeal, she becomes distraught. He must be one big fat lie! She projects her anger towards Him; tears up multiple pages from a Bible that her grandfather, the Bishop, had given to her as a gift, quits attending her volunteering program with the young children in Church and eventually stops attending Church. Leaning on her own understanding, she makes a calculation. One plus one doesn’t equal to Two any more! It’s no rocket science; the Math doesn’t add up!  It never will! She’s lost all that which is within her power to become a Mom. She’s lost everything! She stops believing.

When I think about the many times I have relied on my wisdom as far back as this young girl’s age, I would have long been buried and forgotten! Dragging God into numerous guilt trips, reckless decisions from my basic sense of entitlement, the need to please, the fear to fail, the desire to be validated and a reputation to preserve, have all been a result of leaning on my own understanding! The circumstances revolving around the women above soundly resonate. Thanks to God’s Sufficient Grace that I am not consumed. As they would say in my Hulu all time favorite; The Handmaid’s Tale; Praise Be!

Maturing, I have come to the realization that being clueless about how to react in a tough situation always provokes fear and panic. These three practices, however, have been great tools towards helping me overcome.

1. Openly talking to God about it.

You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.  Psalm 139:2. It makes no sense to beat around the bush, when you believe in a God who knows your every thought. No matter how selfish, astonishing, impure, crud, honest or naive, I have found that being very honest about my thoughts to God stirs up an honest and intimate conversation, which enables me to courageously confront the situation, right from the initial moment of occurence.

Ever read about Peninnah in 1 Samuel 1: 6-18? She’s the one that God had blessed with children from right, left and center, but she mistook the Hand of God for her own strength and began to ridicule her co-wife Hannah for her inability to conceive.  Hannah turned to God, speaking to Him from her heart’s core, to the extent that Eli the priest believed her to have been drunk. But she boldly confessed of her affliction and the hope that God would answer in her great time of need! The priest blessed her and prayed that God may grant her desire!  There was no shame in her game at this point for fear no longer consumed her! She had given up control and handed the baton back in the hand of the one who knew her race from start to finish! It was much easier that way and oh yes, very rewarding too! The following year, she gave birth to a baby boy, Samuel! Talk to God!

2. Believe in yourself.

Philippians 4:13. I can do all things through Him who gives me strength. Accomplishing our goals is solely dependent on our God-given strength.  Panic and fear come as a result of our physical and mental exertion, which we have clearly established to be futile. It is okay to exhibit this as an initial reaction so long as we quickly revert to the truth. Whatever God says to us in His word and in our pursuit of Him, is the truth.

I am quickly reminded of how Leah inflicted unnecessary mental distress on her sister and fellow wife, Rachel, causing her to offer her maidservant, Bilhah to lay with her husband and bear her children. Leah seeing Rachel’s blessing, became consumed with jealousy and the root of bitterness found a soft spot within her. In two shakes of a lamb’s tail, it was a childbirth competition in Laban’s estate! Leah turned to Zilpah, her maidservant for more children, forgetting all what God had done for her in His loving kindness and mercy, without previously needing her help in this matter. She had stripped Him of His power, replacing it with her own.

I don’t recall the scriptures highlighting any complaints from Jacob to either of his wives, except when Rachel cried out to him to give her children and Jacob despondently responded that He wasn’t the God who had kept her from having Children, Gen 30:2. God and I haven’t been able to hammer out a deal yet, without my need to impose judgement on Jacob, but I would hate to think that he just senselessly lay there, allowing his body to do all the thinking! Nevertheless, his father in law had just dealt him an ugly hand of deception. He would seem to care less if granted in marriage the hands of all the women in that household! Perhaps God had instructed Him to do nothing or maybe he just knew better to steer clear of a losing battle: Hell has no fury, like a woman scorned!

Of course the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree! These young women had walked in the very footsteps as their grandmother Sarah, who had laughed in Gen 18:13-14, when God said that He would bless her with a Child. One glance at her advanced age and she set up her youthful maid servant with her husband! Like Sophia Greenleaf, her own understanding had caused her to deduce that all the odds of child bearing were absolutely not in her favor! Alas! Unbelief was bred and out of Hagar’s womb and Abraham’s loins, came forth Ishmael! But wait! The promised boy’s name was Isaac! Gen 17:19.  Believe in what God tells you! Believe in your power to hear Him! Believe in yourself!

3. Share your experience.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered,  two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Although getting through this tough season in Sophia’s life hasn’t been easy, she has the full support of her family and friends. At times you may want to retract into your cocoon and wish that you could forget, or this could all go away somehow, but confronting your red zone is always the healthier choice. Once you establish that the Lord is in full control, then you begin to build up confidence in yourself. Eventually, you’ll find that opening up about your experiences to those that God has led your way is the cherry on the cake! The surprise at how alone you are not is a breath of fresh air!

There’s so much wisdom and non-utilized resources out there! Pray that God may draw good friends your way, have the courage to make new friends, talk to someone you trust, date, fall in love, get married, travel the world, join support groups, host Bible study groups, throw parties, volunteer and be a good friend! You are never alone!

Friends are where one offloads what
One cannot bear alone —
Spoiled goods that jam the gut,
Sorrows turned to stone.

Why does the act of telling friends
One’s troubles ease one’s pain?
Nothing changes, nothing ends,
Yet one can cope again.

It’s not that one is looking for
Advice or sympathy.
One has pent-up words to pour
Into reality.

A friend is like a field on which
Such feelings can find air.
The point is not to say too much,
But simply to be there.

-Nicholas Gordon

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to Him and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6.

#SayNoToFear

Taking a moment of silence is one of the several gestures that show respect and honor when mourning the loss of soldiers in many countries. These men and women dedicate their lives to serving their countries, enduring difficult duties, physical exercise, time away from family, life threatening disorders, the risk of disability, imminent death, et cetera! Yet, they boldly make the choice to take on their assignments, hoping that their mission will by all means end in victory! That’s faith!

Soldiership is innate! As soon as we are born, we hit the ground running, defending ourselves from anyone or anything that is likely to cause us harm. Fight or flight; our ultimate zeal to survive! Jael, fearlessly seized an opportunity with a treacherous murder seduction! Judges 4:21-22. The wise woman of Abel-Beth-Maachah discreetly, yet boldly orchestrated a major beheading, while it was all candlelight candid for King David, somewhere in the Desert of Paran, when a beautiful woman named Abigail won over his heart with her wisdom! 1 Samuel 25.

While it is sufficient to say that these three women inarguably helped prevent undesirable bloodshed through their act of courage, their response would probably not own up to being fearless, but rather to encountering a difficult situation in the face of terror, and having to make a decision! And the right decision it was indeed! Faith transcends sight. The belief in something greater is our motivation, our driving force, our hope.

Transitioning from one level of growth to another is no joke. Every developmental stage has its pros and cons and just like the service men and women above, it takes a lot of hard work and perseverance to break through in pursuit of our passions, goals and dreams! In dominion pursuit! God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” Genesis 1:28.

How good and pleasant it is, when God’s people dwell together in unity. Psalm 133:1. A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for a time of adversity. Proverbs 17:17. So where did we go wrong? As I deeply reflect with great intent, I can’t help but ponder on the rising tension due to world terror, including the recent attacks on my country Kenya; innocent blood shed and lost lives. Words to sum up my revelation, elude me. He’s too perfect to describe this our God, our loving Father. His plans for us all are without a doubt, good, for He is good. Amidst terror and chaos, teach us to turn our hearts back to you, Dear First Love! Grant us the wisdom to understand our purpose and teach us how to pray according to your will. Teach us how to stay guarded and grounded through your word, that we may experience your mighty Hand!

Sensitize us to your Spirit as you teach us how to hear and discern your voice. How to clothe ourselves in your armor and have compassion over our fellow brothers. Teach us to be poor in spirit and rich in kindness that we may radiate your everlasting love! Grant us an alert spirit, rejoicing in you always, without being ignorant of the enemy’s conniving ways. Teach us how to receive your love as well as share it with others. Teach us obedience, exercising godliness with contentment. Teach us your will and reveal your heart to us in your precious Son’s name.

Revelation 8:1-4. When he opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. Then I saw the seven angels who stand in God’s presence, and they were given seven trumpets. Another angel came with a gold incense burner and stood at the altar. He was given a lot of incense to offer on the gold altar in front of the throne. He offered it with the prayers of all of God’s people. The smoke from the incense went up from the angel’s hand to God along with the prayers of God’s people.

When I first read verse one above, I was completely blown away by the thought that this is how our prayers get presented to the Lord, every time! He delights in listening to them and answering us according to His will. I began to get excited, then paused to thank Him for being such a loving Father and being so mindful of me even at that moment as I unfolded more mysteries behind His intricate wisdom! I quickly reflected on Psalm 46:10: ‘Be still and know that I am God’. The expectation of God for us His Children, is to completely be still in joyful hope, trusting that He hears and will answer in due time! A reminiscent of the troops honor! I imagined His mood, as joy and sadness coexisted through our petitions! None of it had caught Him by surprise! He knew what to expect, way before it was presented to Him: A thought too beautiful to fathom!

Reading on, a major shift took place in my frame of mind, as the breathtaking silence was succeeded by catastrophe! I thought of John and what a tough cookie he really must have been! Undoubtedly afflicted by these mesmerizing events, a lack of a Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, (PTSD) diagnosis remained a mystery, until I realized the truth! He couldn’t have suffered from one! God wouldn’t have allowed it! Just like Jesus, he had to endure, so that scripture may be fulfilled! That we may soldier on in faith and in joyful anticipation of that which is soon to come! He had fully been equipped for the job. Suddenly, my mind reverted to the reason why I quit reading the book of Revelation in the first place; fear!

The enemy always seemed to have a way with me, gripping me with fear and winning every time! To my understanding, the odds of being among 144,000 out of 7 billion, seemed absolutely not in my favor! The bar had been set too high! I would never reach it, not while studying the book of Revelation or any other for that matter without understanding! I had been striving to eat meat before growing any teeth! It was too soon to be weaned. I needed to stay on the milk a little longer, building the patience to mature into the next level! I needed to grow!

Bringing up all the 7 billion of us is not a one parent task! It takes the Holy Trinity; God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, to have a complete work in us! Soon, I joined a Bible study in my local church, for two years! The more I searched out the heart of God; the more I matured in wisdom and understanding! I am not quite there yet, but thanks to the Holy Spirit, my Dear Friend, that I am no longer a slave to fear!

A time is coming, when the Heaven will go silent for a good 30 minutes, preceding the detriment that will soon follow. No prayers will be answered that day, for the time will have come for the Lord to test the loyalty of those who claim to really serve Him in Spirit and in Truth. A time when the word in the bones will be the only way of escape for the believing soldier; a son of God, (or daughter), an heir to His Kingdom, a faithful and loyal friend and without a shadow of doubt, His most prized possession! A time when the truth will need no defense. When faith will inevitably be the only weapon of war, and like The Reverend Martin Luther King Jr., and all other martyrs, every armed soldier must boldly fight, even to the point of death! The war is not against humans, but forces and authorities and rulers of darkness and powers in the spiritual world. Ephesians 6:12.

Well, I don’t know what will happen now. We’ve got some difficult days ahead. But it really doesn’t matter with me now, because I’ve been to the mountaintop. And I don’t mind. Like anybody, I would like to live – a long life; longevity has its place. But I’m not concerned about that now. I just want to do God’s will. And He’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the Promised Land. So I’m happy, tonight. I’m not worried about anything. I’m not fearing any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord. – Martin Luther King Jr.

I tremble in affectionate reverence of your truth o Lord my redeemer!

May I be diligent enough to make my calling and election sure! 2 Peter 1:10.

 
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 

Listening to young girls share their concerns during mentorship, most of which emerge as the basis of their fear, has opened my eyes to the light that our reaction to the everyday fear, worry, and intimidation has a lot to do with how we dealt with issues while growing up. Proverbs 22:6; ‘Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.’

As far as this verse is concerned, Parents are the first line of defense in training a child. Half of what they learn from their Parents is most likely, solely based on their actions. Little humans especially, have a great admiration for their heroes, imitating them to the core! Then follows everyone else that Parents entrust their children to; Extended relatives, School, Church, Friends, Mentors, Counselors, et cetera.

Training and teaching someone involves offering them instruction concerning a particular subject, which means, one must first be qualified in that area, either through studying or actually experiencing it.  Gaining experience from grounded and knowledgeable people, is therefore, paramount to the general well being of the recipients, as this plays a great role in their identity. Titus 2: 3-6; ‘Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.’

I am learning the importance of being sure and honoring every call over my life. 2 Peter 1:10. You cannot teach a woman how to be a girl. One is first a girl, then a woman, with the exception of the first woman, Eve, who literally took all her womanly cues from God.  Gen 2:22-24. Therefore, a woman, should always pause along the way for some self evaluation, confront and solve any discovered inconsistencies with conviction, then proceed to teach with absolute caution, trusting in the one who gives the ability to stand. Jude 1:24

Unfortunately, the world denies some people the privilege to naturally develop from a young girl to a woman, when they become sexually assaulted or married off and start bearing children as early as the age of Nine. Eventually, some recover by God’s grace, catch on and run the usual course of life, while others just don’t. The litmus of life is a battlefield, where faith remains the only antidote to fear. Jesus was crucified; Fear has no hold over us! Jesus conquered death; Faith is our destiny

For the teenage girl reading this, walk with me an extra mile to a place where I have already been and conquered my fears by God’s grace! In rallying to attack, soldiers in a battle field let out a battle cry to inspire afresh or stimulate that last ounce of courage, while remaining focused on absolute victory. Whilst most common battles happen in arenas or open fields, you seldom have to be engaged in physical combat to be in a war zone. You may be seated in a Doctor’s office right now, worried sick about your lab results, or sick to your stomach about an exam that you’re just about to sit for.  A new acne onset just before your prom? Great! Stick to the plan though! It’s a normal phase that will eventually pass.

Struggling to attain good grades?  Fear not! It’s okay. Recognize that there are other extracurricular activities that you can engage in as you take a break to formulate a more feasible study plan.  The inevitable natural occurrence of your monthly period awkwardly comes knocking, and though those PMS symptoms keep driving you nuts, hang in there, you’ll eventually learn how to manage them. The same applies to that nasty vaginal yeast infection. The right treatment, proper hygiene and a healthy diet are most likely all you’ll need to get rid of it.  Being bullied? Kindly talk to someone about it, as you discover the great potential within and learn to boldly stand up for yourself.

Fighting with your best friend?  You are both growing and are each entitled to your own opinion! Learn to recognize your mistakes and apologize for them. Be sure to keep the right company, and spare your morals from being corrupted. The boy you’re crushing on pays no attention to you at all? Ignore him and engage in healthy distractions like volunteering at your local Library.  

Remember your body is changing and your sex hormones are at their peak. Be sure not to give in to your vulnerability. Girly girl vs Tomboy? Step out in the fashion that you love irrespective of your dress size. Be sure to be mindful of your health by engaging in exercises and healthy eating habits. Find a slot for a sedentary lifestyle in your trash can!

However your battle with fear looks like, have faith in the one who gave you life! Trust Him alone because others that you turn to may not always understand your battle cry. They may even mistake it to mean something else, like the American College Football Auburn Tigers fans did in the War Eagle Legend 2 Tradition. But, be encouraged as you soldier through life, study His word and know that in all your battles, you have a mighty audience of one; Jesus Christ! He will never mistake anything about you, therefore, be brave no matter what you face for He is always with you and has already won all your battles! Step out in faith! You are in charge!

Happy New Year!

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

2 Tim 1:7.

#SayNoToFear

A woman’s pre-delivery check list is most likely to resemble this one;

• Comfortable clothes
• Toiletries
• Breast pads 
• Sanitary pads
• Nursing bras 
• Lots of underwear
• Slippers 
• Nightgowns 
• Baby car seat 
• Bath robes and towels 
• Receiving blankets 
• Baby’s outfits; socks, hat, onesies, warm clothes, etcetera 

Which means she’s probably already set up the baby’s crib, had a baby shower and received almost all the baby items in her gift registry. 

Can you imagine all the odds that were against young Mary? Going up from Nazareth to Bethlehem for a census registration, implying an 80 mile walk up the hills, valleys and mountains; almost Nine months pregnant, not certain of when to return, foreign city, etc. She had to have banked a lot on her feet, the donkey and heavenly strength to carry her through!

The Bible reckons that the baby did indeed arrive while she was in Bethlehem, leaving Faith as the only item on her pre-delivery checklist! There was no room available for them, so she wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger; the exact sign that the shepherds would need to identify Jesus and spread the news of his birth! 

Whilst the passage in Luke 2, doesn’t mention the origin of the cloths that wrapped Him or the manger where He lay, I would like to believe that, God trusted the wisdom He has given unto us, as far as our wildest imagination is concerned, would allow this unprecedented true story to speak for itself.  May the simplicity of the truth of His Word impact us to Kingdom come!

More gifting would soon follow; frankincense, myrrh and the one of your dreams; gold! She believed that the Lord would fulfill His promise, His way! Her credulous faith surely did go a long way! She believed! She waited!

I pray that you may know Him and that the power of His resurrection may reveal His everlasting love to you and your dear ones!  

Happy birthday to all you out there who share this special day with our Lord and savior! Shout out to my Homegirl, Christine Njeri! Love you friend! To all the expectant Mothers with this awesome due date; make sure Faith and Hope are top of the list on your pre-delivery check list! Have fun! I am praying for you! 

To all my fellow waiting Mothers; soldier on in joyful hope! #InDueTime! Oh! Add Faith to the top of your pre-conception list as well! Keep shining!

As you put the finishing touches to your Christmas plans in the next few days, be sure not to rub off the shimmer from your lending hand! Shining is a lifestyle! 

Merry Christmas! Shine on Jesus! It’s all about you! May our sacrifice this season be acceptable to you oh Prince of Peace, Mighty King and Wonderful Counselor! 

I love you Jesus! 

 When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."  John 8:12

#InspiringYourLightToShine

At Joppa there was a certain disciple named Tabitha, which is translated Dorcas. This woman was full of good works and charitable deeds which she did.Acts 9:36 NKJV

Imagine being so much loved by your neighbours and friends, that your absence creates an unreplenishable void. Obviously, Tabitha wasn’t operating in the flesh. She had yielded and totally surrendered to the spirit of God, impacting so many around her with her kindness. They needed her raised up from the dead, not only to continue with her good works, but also that others could learn from her and pass the gift along. Peter had appropriated his gift of healing and the world being aware of it, knew exactly what to do; fetch him! Two different gifts largely at work for the glory of God! Not everyone who fetched Peter had probably been kind to him and this was a great opportunity to pay back their nuisance, but Peter knew that what He possessed was bigger than himself. Bigger than ‘a sweet revenge feeling’, or a mere satisfactory, ‘am busy’ or ‘ain’t nobody got time for that’ kind of an attitude! He had to run and fulfill it, for it was an opportunity for God to be glorified.

Such is you Mom; the epitome of kindness, grace, love and total sacrifice! It was an honor to celebrate you in so many ways Yesterday!

You’ve always been there for my entire Family and many others who have grown under your affection and influence.  You have been present in every milestone in our lives, never missed a single day of High School visitations, so protective of us and never afraid to cause embarrassing scenes to mold us, like the highlight of that night in Form Two, (10th Grade), when my Sister Carol and I sneaked off to a Disco Party, and you came looking for us, then requested the DJ to pause the music and give a shout out to your underage Daughters! ‘Special dedication, special dedication’, began the DJ in sarcasm. ‘Wambui and Carol, your Mother is waiting for you outside!’  You uttered no single word to us till we got home, and you finally said, ‘It’s New Year’s eve. Go to bed!’ We had reached the nadir of our teenage life and your maternal instinct knew not to add insult to injury! We had learnt our lesson!

A woman is like a tea-bag, you never know how strong she is, until you put her in hot water.

Eleanor Roosevelt

The red zone has broken you numerous times, as an individual, a daughter, a wife, a Mother, in your teaching career, in advocating for your beliefs, in your community service, as a friend, and in several other areas, yet you’ve remained headstrong and resilient.  You are a warrior, overcoming lots of life’s obstacles by God’s grace, and teaching us how to keep the faith. Soon, you’ll be 70 years old, you’re still so driven and the most hardworking woman I know. Kind and ever so eager to answer to any call for a need. Your home is always open to all, and as per 1 Peter 3:7, you’ve given honor to Dad as your co-heir in the grace of life, shining light to the wisdom I once studied from Matthew Henry, that Peter referring to wives as the weaker vessels is not at all derogatory, on the contrary, their submission cues, are solely derived from the example of Christ! Their trust is entirely in the Lord!

• 

Mom, am at a loss for words when I think of your amicable presence in our lives.  For all what you have done for us, thank you! We may not always see eye to eye, on everything, but the older I grow, the more I see a lot of things as you see them. Busy chasing after Motherhood, I can only pray that I will be the kind of Mom that you have been to us and much more. One who whisks her sickly teenage Sister on her back and runs to the road shouting for help, hoping to catch a good Samaritan’s ride to the hospital, who walks in to find her infant granddaughter in respiratory distress from a stuffy nose, quickly picks her up and sucks out all the mucus from the infant using her mouth! (Who needs a bulb syringe?).  A friend, who grieves, comforts and prays with her grown daughter during her time of loss, who grants a million second chances to her Children, who loves unconditionally with wisdom from above! The kind of Mom that God wants me to be!

• 

We are extremely blessed to have you for a Mom. Thank you for fiercely molding Christ to us!  May your shining light ripple over the entire world! I love you. Happy birthday Mom!

#InspiringYourLightToShine

When you give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed.

Maya Angelou

I am honored to be a part of Girlz with a vision Mentoring Group, which according to their mission statement, ’empowers and inspires girls to overcome the challenges of negative influences and create a positive change within themselves and their communities.’

Parents; 2019, open enrollment for Girls ages 9-18 is on! Hurry and sign them up! 

They participate in various events throughout the year, among which is the Annual Skate with Santa Toy Drive, benefiting Ronald McDonald House Charities of Alabama. 

It’s not too late to drop off a toy now through December 13th, 2018, at 530 Beacon Parkway W, Birmingham, 35209.  You could also make a donation to the organization using the link below and make a difference.

Let your light shine! Matthew 5:16

http://www.vision1inc.org/

All around you, lies an opportunity to give!

Juliet; a dear childhood friend of mine, through her mentoring organization; Juliet Migwi Inspires, helps vulnerable children growing up in poverty, realize their potential, self actualize, creating for themselves a future with better prospects.  She’s also an author, currently running a ‘Drop-A-Star Drive’, which involves adopting a children’s home or community center by helping her accumulate hard copy books to donate to that Home or Center.

When you buy her book ‘Kemboi Picks His Best Friend’, she will donate ‘Kemboi Finds His Talent’. 

Follow her on Facebook, @Juliet Migwi or Juliet Migwi Inspires, for more information.

You are the light of the world! Matthew 5:14

1. Dear Lord, through your help, I will adhere to the study and teaching of your Word. My path will forever remain lit. Psalm 119:105
2. Thank you Lord that I never again have to sit in darkness in Satan’s captivity. I am no longer Spiritually dead! Matthew 4:16
3. Holy Spirit, thank you for illuminating Christ’s light unto my life. I have overcome through God’s love!  John 8:12
4. Father God, you light up my walk, highlighting every work of the enemy, that I may overcome. You keep me safe and offer your support in my weakness. I shall not be consumed!  Psalm 27:1
5. I will draw away from every manner of slumber and selfish indulgence, that Christ’s light may shine upon me! Ephesians 5:14
6. Thank you Lord for handpicking me and making me your own. I will sing of your majesty and wondrous love for you have redeemed me from the enemy’s snare and granted me eternal life! 1 Peter 2:9
7. I will forever glory with you O Lord my redeemer, for your knowledge and wisdom light up the Heavens! Revelation 21:23

#InspiringYourLightToShine

According to the Cambridge English Dictionary, a setback is something that happens or delays a process from happening.  From my experience, I have found that most of the setbacks involve some type of loss; life, general well-being, resources and other greatly valuable items.  With any type of loss, comes grief; a perfect catalyst for the red zone induction! 

The grief cycle is viciously repetitive, and ever so fresh with every new wound!

While lining up to check out at a regular grocery store, sometime back, I noticed the cashier to have a flat affect. I had taken note of her jovial personality in the past, and though we were not buddy-buddy, I immediately knew that something was wrong.  I could hardly wait to get to the counter, smile at her and perhaps strike a cheerful carrots and raisins conversation for the love of baking! The mere thought made my heart light up, almost wallowing in my own brilliance, when suddenly, I began to talk myself with obsessive precision as to why I needed to thoroughly mind my own business!  What? I immediately felt the weight of these two distinct split ideas, resting heavily upon my mind. I clenched my fists onto my buggy and while shaking my head, I exhaled! I wasn’t about to go mad in public! 

Although both ideas were valid, I began to agree more with the latter. All around the world, someone somewhere is going through a difficult time, and sometimes choosing not to talk about it, doesn’t mean that the never ending love and support from Family and Friends has been consigned to oblivion. Some days are just truly harder than others, and coming to terms with oneself, is all the cure there is! But when a shining light goes off from the world, you’re bound to flee at how fast the mask slips! We live for each other!

My turn finally came, I put on a smile, said a quick hello, and went quiet, just as I had promised myself. She said a quick hello back and proceeded with my check out.  I didn’t have a lot of items, but her pace was slower than the second coming!  When she got to the raisins, my heart started pounding. I could no longer contain myself! I smiled and finally asked, ‘how are you doing today?’ She looked at me and paused for a moment, as if I looked familiar, then said, ‘am alright, thanks for asking’. By this time, she was on my last item, and I began to get convicted over my thoughts for the last few minutes. As she handed me the receipt, I looked into her eyes and said, ‘thank you, God bless you and have a lovely day’, and began to walk away, fulfilled, while shaming my lying thoughts!

 ‘Actually Ma’am, could you hold on for a minute?’ She said as I walked away. I quickly looked back, with the certainty that she was addressing me. ‘Sure’, I said, and began to walk back to the counter. She hurried to attend to the other customer already in line, as I patiently waited by the side, hopeful that the Lord had seen my conviction and given me a chance to redeem myself!

Lo and behold! No sooner had the next customer loaded his buggy, than she took a piece of paper, wrote something on it and gave it to me saying, ‘I like your spirit. You look like you can pray. I would like for you to pray for my Son. That’s his name. I recently lost him to jail!’

Selah

There is nothing little about this light of mine, or yours either! Let it shine dear luminary! Let it shine, by God’s grace!

For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. 2 Corinthians 4:6 NIV

#InspiringYourLightToShine

You know, everybody has setbacks in their life, and everybody falls short of whatever goals they might set for themselves. That’s part of living and coming to terms with who you are as a person. 

HILLARY CLINTON

Is it November yet? Ha! I had every intention to participate in ‘blog like crazy’, this year, (thanks to Javacia Harris of See Jane Write), but as in the quote above, I recently faced a setback that dwindled my goal! My plan was to finally publish my blog, (two years later), and work towards it every single day of November as the challenge demands. Well, I have finally come to terms with the reality of who I am, it’s still the last day of November and my blog is finally up! Yay! Until the recent past, this would have been just one more excuse for me to further procrastinate, but that ship has long sailed!  

Embracing life is an art of grace! 

The following is an edited version of my first litmus concept from my Facebook page in 2016 and it couldn’t have been re-birthed at a better time! I find that am still able to clearly see, even in immense darkness! Know who you are and the value of what you deeply possess!  Because of God’s love, we are not consumed! 

When I first posted similar photos to these as my profile pictures on Facebook, they got tons of likes, including mine! I suppose there are many reasons about the photos that may have attracted the likes, for example, the beautiful blend of the yellow and blue African kitenge outfit, very neatly put together by my designer aunt Analisha Wangui, (from a beautiful town called Kutus in Central Kenya), the little black dress by Theory (which I at times wear as a tank depending on the occasion, in this case; Church flow), or perhaps the white pair of The Stilt cigarette jeans by AG, etc.

I could redundantly go on about this already fully painted picture, (for the love of fashion), but let me share about my favorite reason and one of the many things these pictures have in common; black background! It simply makes the color of the images pop! Just look up at the constellations on a dark quiet night, or stand on a cliff overlooking any metropolitan city in the dark of the night and get the bigger picture. John ‭1:5‬ ‭talks about light shining in darkness and the darkness not being able to comprehend it. The Son of God, the light of the world, has freely been revealed to us by God our Father, yet we at times can’t seem to resist the blindfold!

In an article I recently read by Scott R. Kline, these words by Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist Carl Jung, blew my mind. ‘One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.’  Every time I want to catch a glimpse of the darkness that surrounds the world today, I just tune into; Charter (now Spectrum) cable CNN’s news channel 37 or if I want to make it a bit more private, then I take a simple walk down memory lane, into some of my life’s experiences. That’s the proof of how deeply Jung’s words resonate. It’s all a roller coaster of buried mixed emotions that ought to be confronted in order to fulfill life’s purpose. It’s not the darkness I really search for you see, it’s the presence of the already shining light!

I don’t know what kind of a hand this world has dealt you, but may it boost your ego just by being aware of the power you possess as a shining light in every dark situation, previously, currently or yet to be encountered. The enemy of our soul knows his way around and surely pounces at the very first sign of a loophole! 1 Peter ‭5:8‬ ‭asks us to be sober and vigilant; because our adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. He doesn’t have to get either of us.  In the 2016 Republican convention in Cleveland, Marcus Luttrell, a former United States Navy SEAL, in his speech asked, ‘Who among you is gonna step up and take the fight to the enemy, because it’s here?’ It’s a fight not against flesh and blood, but principalities and vigorous powers and rulers, that require us to put on the armor of God as per Ephesians 6:13 and then stay grounded to withstand the enemy because sooner or later, we will all inevitably slip into a deeper darkness and eventually awaken into an everlasting glorious light!

Just as young Samuel stood as a glimmer of hope during a dark period in Israel, let every dark situation in your life, appropriate the light within you!

Shine!

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:16 NIV

#inspiringyourlighttoshine